The Jaggy Thistle, (recyled) review of the year

It was Barbara Dixon who once started off promisingly reciting the months of the year before getting stuck on February, but here at JT Mansions we're made of sterner stuff as prove this 12 part excuse to recycle material of doubtful provenance will...

January
Mark McGhee, football coach impersonator, issued a not especially convincing plea to be judged anew on taking the No2 spot at the job-creation project known as the "Scotland set-up."

February
Philip Tartaglia, brought off the Cardinal's bench as a sub for man-liker Cardinal O'Brien,made it clear that there would be no homosexual activity on his watch...

March

In not at all unexpected news, New  Cumnock won the most depressing place in Scotland award, strangely missing out on the "post-apocalypse, everywhere will look like this award"...

April
The death of Margaret Thatcher divided UK opinion between those who thought she was alright and those who know she was an a-one, complete, Jeremy Hunt. But we did speculate what the scene might look like if she'd come back to life...

May
Famous for liking the odd pint or six and supposedly revelling in the rough and tumble of street politics, Nigel Farage came to Edinburgh and immediately revised his opinion about the second bit...

June
David Cameron, keen to brandish his progressive, socially -liberal credentials, you know, the ones that apparently excuse the rest of his viciously reactionary agenda, gets down with the gays...

July
Look everyone! Mumford and Sons played T in The Park!
 (Apologies again to Charlie Brooker for just stealing his gag).

August
If the Yes campaign wins in 2014, one rather imagines it will be in spite of the leadership...

September
Jack Vettriano, who continues to infuriate the arts world by making money and not being dead, issued a warning ahead of an exhibition of his work...(via The Skintman).

October
You know that last Scottish Secretary? The one that no one knew who he was? Well, it happened again...

November
Alex and Nicola prepare to diversify their product portfolio...

"Don't forget your cigarette lighters and sports socks, two pairs the pound..."

December
No there isn't a December, because forgive me but I'm going to indulge myself even more than usual by breaching a self-imposed rule never to talk about stuff without a Scottish angle. But since everyone has already talked about it, can I point you to our little fan boy tribute to Breaking Bad? 
The video is designed around the conceit that Bryan Cranston is a massive fan of Steely Dan, that SD's Kid Charlemagne is about Owsley Stanley, an 1960s acid cook AND Bryan's character "Hal" in Malcolm in The Middle claimed that he'd used the Charlemagne handle while working as a pirate DJ.
 If history ultimately makes fools of us all, this is one instance, probably never to be repeated, when we could be said to be ahead of the curve. 
Everyone now is quite rightly hailing BB as a masterpiece, we thought so as well when we produced this tribute, in May 2010.
 Please indulge us and with any luck the YT views will breach the 3000 mark, especially if you point fellow Breakers (?) in the right direction. Anyway, a good new year to everyone, see you on the other side..